Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
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