that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
Randomize