Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
Floor bacon is actually really good
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
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