Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
Randomize
