Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
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