I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Randomize
