R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
