Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Randomize
