The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
Silently passing ghastly beer farts as I move around the bridal department at Tiffany's. Call it my contribution to the holiday spirit.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Randomize
