i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
Randomize
