He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize
