Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
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It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
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How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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