did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
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