oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
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