Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
Life lesson: when driving and throwing up, choose a paper bag over plastic. Fuck my life.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
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