This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
