Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Randomize
