the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
