Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
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