we have pet lesbian snakes
my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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