Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
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