I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
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He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
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I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
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