i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
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