Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
Randomize