love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I want to make a zoo with you.
she woke up with a sticky ear
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
Randomize
