Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
