I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
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