i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
