I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
I just want to make out with him forever
The power of my boobs compel you
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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