i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
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