shit! I think I may have lost something in your car. Look for anything that can possibly belong to me, especially look out for a pair of pink panties in a ziplock. I lost my spare and you better find it before someone else does.
I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
The upside of Thirsty Thursdaying with the client last night was that he was so hungover that he didn't want to spend time wrangling over the contract extension this morning.
Boss just said I'm getting a bonus for this. Want to celebrate our anniversary a week early tonight?
This is why I married you.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Randomize
