It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize