Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
All the doctor said was why
Randomize
