Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
I'm like, not good at living.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
Randomize
