Tell her she can't have a vagina
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
I should be sponsored by Trojan
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
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