I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
You are a booty call, not a friend.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
Randomize
