apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
I'm just crazy horny about you
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
