eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
I have fence marks all over my body
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
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