For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
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