Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
me + whiskey = a bad person
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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