Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
