Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
Randomize
