# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
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