Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
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