Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize