is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
Randomize
