You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
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