I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Randomize
