You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize
