yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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