Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
My room smells like vodka and shame
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
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